Here’s the skinny…

I’m having a mid life crisis. I’m not kidding. Within a year and a half I separated from a 25 year relationship/marriage and moved in with my dad. I turned 50, my only child left for college IN A DIFFERENT COUNTRY and then my husband died. This story alone could be a best selling novel…or so all my friends keep telling me. But beyond this is a legitimate midlife crisis. 

The world has once again opened up to me. I, to a reasonable point, have to worry only about me. This truth has been hard to come to terms with. I am not a “work-from-home…take-an-online-class”  sort of person…meaning I’m not disciplined. I need a routine, boundaries, pacing. You know-have dinner ready by 5, get the kid to swim by 6. But now, I have so many options, my head is swirling. I feel un-grounded. There are so many choices before me that I’m scared I will make the wrong one…which results in me not making any choice. I’m floundering.

I have been accused of having “empty nest syndrome” but it goes beyond missing a role as mother. I now have an unlimited amount of choices in ALL facets of my life. It’s unsettling!  I sought therapy and was told that I need to stop answering, “I don’t know” to the question, “What do you want to do?”

In the last few months, I have actively looked into moving to Europe, the coast, the mountains; I have looked into over 10 new profession options; viewed over 50 houses to buy- written  an offer on 3 (all which fell through for one reason or another) and it has been mentally exhausting!canterbury

I need to stop and make some decisions. So, I’m going on vacation. I’ve rented a house in Canterbury, England for the summer- yes, the ENTIRE summer- and I’m sharing my experience with you.

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