I’m sure there are some people out there wondering how the hell I am pulling this off, so I’ll share a LITTLE bit of information with you. After all, I am a single mother living on a NC teacher’s salary. You all have seen the news. Our state ranks 43 in teacher pay. I’ll give the tip of the iceberg. I’ll save the iceberg for the best selling novel my friends keep pushing me to write.
After an unsuccessful/unhappy 25 year relationship/marriage, I finally grew a pair and left. I packed a suitcase for me and my son and I left all that I had. Literally. Everything. There is a defining moment that finally allowed me to make this move…a move I had thought about for many years, but had no idea how. I was scared, didn’t believe enough in myself to think that I could succeed on my own with a child. So I accepted the bed that I made and I laid in it.
Here is my saving force–I went back to school. I know what you’re thinking, you’re a high school teacher, you go to school every day, but that is for other people. I went back to school FOR ME. I started a Master’s program with a cohort from my county and it started to change me. At first, we did many groups things and although we were praised for our work, I really felt that I wouldn’t be able to do it if I was on my own. It wasn’t until the second summer session, when I took a few classes specifically for my Literature component, that I realized I was a good student and analytical writer! I was given validation that my ideas… my analysis… my opinions…were worthy.
I can’t convey to you the power it had on how I viewed myself. I felt myself re-inflate! I finally felt capable. I finally felt empowered. I finally felt brave. I finally walked away from an emotionally unhealthy home-life situation. Education saved me.
With this separation came a settlement that allowed me to go back to square one. I was able to start with a clean financial slate. I would not be having this adventure if this was not the case. But there you have it. It happened and I can. I am fortunate.
This is hand I’ve been dealt and I am making the most of it. I am also happy again. 🙂